In this happy day, inspiration likes to come without permission, until bedtime has to be given up in order to express one's thoughts.
This time, I want to talk about "Young Marriage".
There are so many people who talk about #NikahMuda, especially when they first emigrated, it seems that the first thing that often becomes an obstacle is matters of the heart. In Islam itself, guarding the heart is obligatory. Even if we express feelings of love in an inappropriate way, that's the fall of "Adultery".
So? My perspective of young marriage is neutral. I can't force you to marry young if there's no candidate yet hehe. Only from my point of view and trying to relate to Islamic law, I actually found various kinds of miracles and of course, marriage in Islam is an important thing which is an "antidote" for those who can no longer contain their lust.
Before going into the next discussion, I want to explain what you have to prepare to enter marriage.
1. Mental
This is the main thing, it is important and you really must have it if you want to get married. Why? Many people marry with the promise of love but never measure the extent of their mental strength. Many decide to get married but actually, they are not ready to get it. So, how do you measure mental readiness? Do you have to be able to stabilize all emotions first? but it takes a long time.
I mean that the mental here is where you can adjust yourself to be a person who "plays" many roles. For example, now you are a single woman, you have the desire to get married young, but when you face even small problems, you are still confused and even get angry without any clarity. Your mind has wandered far and planned to run away from problems or play problem stories and post them on social media. it's not worth it.
Usually, you only wake up to clean your room and shower, when you get married you have to be ready to get up at dawn, clean the house, cook, prepare clothes for your husband, and occasionally have to be able to give up a series of skincare steps because you're short on time. Getting married is a big thing, but you don't need to make it big too.
2. Physical
Well, this is also really an important point in the stage of deciding to settle down. Physical here is very influential in the life of you and your child later. Many people decide to marry young because they are MBA (Married by Accident) and their average age is under 17 years. What about the uterus? is it strong for pregnant baby? What will happen after the birth? There have been many studies on the risks of early pregnancy, from the risks of abnormal births to the risks of death.
3. Financial
You really have to hold this third thing. No! That doesn't mean your potential wife or husband has to have a lot of money before marrying you. At the very least, your candidate already has an income, not someone who is still asking for money and being dependent on their parents. Soon, married life will be much harder and will make you become "adult" and "wiser" if you can go through everything with perseverance. Finances are very important, at least he/she has skills and responsibilities that can really be proven in his daily life. It's not that I don't believe in God's context, but this is one form of effort so that marriage can truly be a healthy and mature marriage (in the sense that it rarely or even doesn't involve parents).
4. Tsaqofah (Thoughts)
Well, this one is important too! Sometimes our thoughts about marriage are only "Romanticism" and our views are still only about happy things. Marriage is not an event to show off romance, but marriage is about uniting two people with different thoughts and characters, habits, even what you don't like can become their favorite. This is really a complicated stage but it will be more romantic if we have open-minded thoughts and attitudes. In the future your household won't be filled with big debates whose topics are unclear and don't need to be discussed, for example, "Why do you always watch football on TV?! I like soap operas!" (That's a very small example) but maybe if we don't have an open mind and our mentality is not ready, small problems like this will grow bigger and even strain your relationship. Make your household meaningful in that it discusses the visions and dreams that you both want to realize. It's not filled with debated issues that are exaggerated and then eventually disbanded. Naudzubillah tsumma na'udzubillah.
Are you ready to marry young, Vir?
Yes, for myself, marriage orientation is no longer limited to "romance" and various happy things in it. I've understood and learned a lot from my parents, friends, and those who "split" with problems that are always the biggest triggers for household breakdown. especially if it's not about "Infidelity?"
I am a migrant child. Starting to emigrate from grade 1 of a vocational school and having no basic or special Islamic educational background. For me, the vision of marriage is for worship. It is filled with things that encourage me to be closer to His pleasure.
So, my husband isn't necessarily the type who has a sharp nose and a handsome face like Leonardo DiCaprio.
From the beginning of migrating, I thought I could study Islam in depth alone, but it's not easy for me. There are many views and schools of thought that I do not understand. My dream is to become a useful person, by spreading kindness.
Then according to yourself, are you ready to marry young, Vir?
Yes, for myself, marriage orientation is no longer limited to "romance" and various happy things in it. I've understood and learned a lot from my parents, friends and those who "split" with problems that are always the biggest triggers for household breakdown. especially if it's not about "Infidelity?"
I am a migrant child. Starting to emigrate from grade 1 of a vocational school and having no basic or special Islamic educational background. For me, the vision of marriage is for worship. It is filled with things that encourage me to be closer to His pleasure.
So, my husband isn't necessarily the type who has a sharp nose and a handsome face like Leonardo DiCaprio.
From the beginning of migrating, I thought I could study Islam in depth alone, but it's not easy for me. There are many views and schools of thought that I do not understand. My dream is to become a useful person, by spreading kindness. In conclusion, I don't stand those who support or those who don't because marriage doesn't always have to be over 23 years old, nor does it always have to be 17 years old. Everyone has a different ready side. Above, I have explained several conditions for being ready to get married, hopefully, this will be something you will consider in the future.
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